5 Costly Mistakes Families Make When Choosing Senior Living Options

What you don't know could cost your loved one comfort, happiness—and thousands of dollars

By Keith Breault

Based on ten years of immersion in local options for retirement, these observations will help you navigate the decisions before you. (For context, I do not represent any community or corporation, and you will never pay for any of my services.)

Mistake #1: Assuming the Staff is Stable and Well-Trained

Behind the smiles and brochures, staffing is one of the most fragile parts of senior care today.After more than a decade in this industry, I’ve seen how hard it is to recruit and retain great caregivers. Some communities now rely on outside agencies to fill shifts—creating a revolving door of unfamiliar faces and inconsistent care.The people showing up each day make or break the resident experience. But staffing is one of the things families know the least about when choosing a place.

Mistake #2: Judging the Community by the Tour

You walk in, the lobby looks beautiful, and the staff seems friendly. But those things don’t always reflect the deeper culture.Some communities focus on filling rooms. Others focus on serving people with dignity. That difference starts at the leadership level—in how teams are trained, supported, and held accountable. When staff are treated well, they mirror that in the way they relate to residents.Culture doesn’t show up on a brochure. But it shows up every day in how residents are treated.

Mistake #3: Choosing a Place Where a Position Is Just a Job

Here’s a test: Does the staff work where residents live… or do residents live where the staff works?What I mean by this is that you need to evaluate the mentality around whose experience matters the most. Every resident of a senior living community requires a care plan—including details like interests, hobbies, and sleep patterns. But too often, those plans are skimmed and ignored. Your loved one deserves a place where their preferences matter most.Example: Many communities give medications based on what’s easiest for the team, not what’s right for the resident. I've seen residents routinely woken up early for “med passes” that didn’t respect their preferences. On the other hand, I’ve seen communities where the tiniest details are remembered—so that everyone feels like a member of the family.When staff treat their role like a job, you feel it. When they treat it like a calling, you feel that too.

Mistake #4: Overlooking the Fine Print (Until It’s Too Late)

Verbal promises don’t always hold up once the move-in is complete. Details that seem small at first—like fee increases or service caps—can become big stressors later.Make sure you get these in writing:✅ Annual rate increase limits✅ Care level fee structures✅ Recent ombudsman complaints or incident reportsIf it’s not documented, it’s not guaranteed.

Mistake #5: Trusting Internet Agencies That Sell Your Info

If you’ve searched online, you’ve likely come across large national referral agencies. What most people don’t realize is that these companies charge large referral fees—and forward your contact info to every community they contract with.You’ll be flooded with calls, often from places that aren’t a fit. Beyond that, you won’t get much support. Some agencies also charge you directly.Either way, you’re left navigating alone—or being sold to.But don't worry. There's a better way...

💡The Better Way: Local. Personal. Free.

At Next Step Senior Consulting, we serve as your advocate in the senior living search — helping you find the right fit without the pressure. We specialize specifically in Charlottesville and the Shenandoah Valley.We’ve spent years getting to know each local retirement community: how each is run, who leads them, and which ones truly put care first.You never pay us. We’re paid by the community only after move-in—but our loyalty is always to the family we’re guiding. This is not a one-size-fits all decision, and we match your preferences to the very best option for you.

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Hi, I'm Keith

Before becoming a pastor here in Harrisonburg, I spent over a decade in the senior care industry. And what I saw over those years broke my heart more than once: families overwhelmed, salespeople overpromising, and residents quietly underserved.That’s why I started Next Step—to give families the kind of personal, informed guidance I always wished they had.I work like a buyer’s agent, but for senior living. The difference? You never pay me a cent. My only job is to help your family make the right choice for you—not one I have a vested interest in.There are lots of options, and my job is to help you find the one that’s the very best for your family.If you haven’t filled out the form yet, I’d be honored to talk.Let’s take the next step together.